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Author Topic: Dating Climbers: Good Idea? Bad Idea?  (Read 591 times)

Stickyfingerz

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Dating Climbers: Good Idea? Bad Idea?
« on: June 22, 2003, 10:41:36 PM »

I don't know if this is a proper ol' can o' worms to open up, but here goes.

A question for y'all.

Is it a good idea to date a fellow climber? I've certainly heard arguments on both sides of the issue (pro: climbers are hot, con: climbers are psycho) and have not been able to come up with a definitive consensus. Thus I turn the question over to you, the venerable NEClimbs Forum. (It seems that there are plenty of you out there with years of climbing under your belts, so share your wisdom.) Please provide first-person anecdotal evidence to back up any claims of philosophical authority. (Change the names to protect the innocent, if necessary.)

I currently find myself single and am having a damned hard time finding a girl who's not afraid of dirt, let alone a climber. Is it worth the effort? If so, where are all the climber grrrls? If not, how do you explain your psychosis to a significant other? Ladies, what's your opinion?

Hope you all can shed some light on the topic. Have fun.

;D
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Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear. - Mark Twain

G

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Re: Dating Climbers: Good Idea? Bad Idea?
« Reply #1 on: June 23, 2003, 05:32:59 AM »

Here is a little advice, nothing is either good or bad but thinking makes it so. So stay positive and happy, don't think of climbing as a pychosis, think of it as a passion, love, art. Use climbing as a allegory for life, keep trying, be open to experiences, the harder you try the luckier you get.

Peace
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SFM

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Re: Dating Climbers: Good Idea? Bad Idea?
« Reply #2 on: June 23, 2003, 10:08:44 AM »

Climbers are just like anyone else who have a passion for a sport, activity, whatever, and have made it a lifestyle.

For me, since I love the sport myself, I think it's best to date a climber. Provided he's not some womanizing jerk, he's probably more down-to-earth and in general, fun to be around than the typical guy.  

It's difficult to find females in climbing since it's predominantly male, and as one friend observed, if females are climbing, they are almost always with a boyfriend already. However, I know quite a few single climbing females.

Even if she doesn't climb, there are females out there who are independent and don't mind their men going off for a weekend/week to do their thing. Just hang in there, she'll come along.

~Stephie
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Rembrant

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Re: Dating Climbers: Good Idea? Bad Idea?
« Reply #3 on: June 23, 2003, 11:27:00 AM »

Stephanie,
 Are you single? Do you live near North Conway? Lets go climbing?

I think it would be rather cool if Al put a personals page on his website! It would be the first I have seen and it might cut to the chase a bit.
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Admin Al

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Re: Dating Climbers: Good Idea? Bad Idea?
« Reply #4 on: June 23, 2003, 11:57:54 AM »

so what do YOU think folks? should I add a personals page to NEC? let's see, I can imagine something like this:

=========================
Itinerant male climber looking for hot babe? No phone but you can find me at Rumney Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday, Sundown on Thursday and Friday, and the Boston Rock Gym on Saturday. Sunday is my rest day. I climb 5.11+ but could do 5.13 with you. Looking for 17-22, long hair with penchant for spandex, belaying and road trips.
=========================

hmmm...
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StephieGirl

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Re: Dating Climbers: Good Idea? Bad Idea?
« Reply #5 on: June 23, 2003, 12:07:40 PM »

Rembrandt:

Maybe some day!!!

Admin Al:
Match.com makes some good $ on personals so make sure you make a profit on your cupid playing (should you decide to do that).

~Stephie
« Last Edit: June 23, 2003, 01:22:04 PM by StephieGirl »
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questionable Idea

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Re: Dating Climbers: Good Idea? Bad Idea?
« Reply #6 on: June 23, 2003, 02:38:20 PM »

You know that sounds good to me! Silly yes, desperate, of course! Climbers need this type of community because the modern climbing leaves so little time for proper courtship! Think about it you could put an optional "tick list", favorite crag, climbing experience. I ask everyone, why not?
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StephieGirl

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Re: Dating Climbers: Good Idea? Bad Idea?
« Reply #7 on: June 23, 2003, 02:49:18 PM »

Why not try the already created websites for on-line hookups and put "must be a climber" in the criteria?

Or the Partners forum could be divided into 3 categories "Seeking men," "Seeking women," "Just want to climb, damn it!"  But then you'd have to divide it up even more to include all, ahem, preferences.  Sounds like too much work - let's just focus on climbing and rely on serendipity.
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Admin Al

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Re: Dating Climbers: Good Idea? Bad Idea?
« Reply #8 on: June 23, 2003, 02:57:01 PM »

"Sounds like too much work - let's just focus on climbing and rely on serendipity.  "

now that's a smart lady. <grin> I aready think I have plenty to do...

Al
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lynnie

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Re: Dating Climbers: Good Idea? Bad Idea?
« Reply #9 on: June 26, 2003, 07:19:42 AM »

im with Stephie on this one. climbing guys usually would rather go outside than sit on the couch and watch TV. what a relief.

if you men think that you have a hard time finding a girl who will get dirty, we women also have trouble finding a guy who will miss the NHL playoffs to go TR some local cliff.

i consider myself about the luckiest girl in the world. climbing with my boyfriend (or partner) is rewarding because we improve together, is trust building because we often work together as a team, and just strengthens our relationship. not to mention that as a climber he is the hottest man i have ever seen.... but i dont want to focus just on that.

so i think dating climbing partners is fine, IF you are not too competetive, and are trusting. and, of course, if you have a less than perfect day on the rock you can separate that from your home life.

thats more than 2 cents, i realize.
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LizzyBee

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Re: Dating Climbers: Good Idea? Bad Idea?
« Reply #10 on: June 26, 2003, 07:34:48 AM »

I agree with most of what's been said. I have dated both climbers and non-climbers. It is much easier to date someone who has the same interest(s), someone who "gets it" about how you spend your time and won't make you wrong about it. Also, beware of hooking up with someone who says they've always wanted to try climbing. If they don't take to it with your zeal, it won't last.

Along those lines, I would caution against having your sweetie be your only climbing partner, though. IMO this is the #1 cause of many break-ups.

Lizz
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mickymac1

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Re: Dating Climbers: Good Idea? Bad Idea?
« Reply #11 on: June 26, 2003, 11:29:32 AM »

Quote
I have dated both climbers and non-climbers. It is much easier to date someone who has the same interest(s)



Yes, I agree. IMHO, I believe that compatibility is extremely important in any relationship, from outdoor activities to indoor activities. Yes, the two of you may never be 100% compatible, but isn't 90% better than, say 60%?! Each of you have your own basic wants and needs, such as Affection, Admiration, Reacreational Companionship, Domestic support, and Sexual fulfillment, and the closer you can come to meeting those wants and needs for each other, the stronger that relationship will be!
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StephieGirl

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Re: Dating Climbers: Good Idea? Bad Idea?
« Reply #12 on: June 26, 2003, 11:37:52 AM »

That is definitely true. I think certainly that if you climb so much, it's better to find someone in the sport because he/she'll be more supportive.  Of course, it's quite a bummer for the fellas who climb because they far exceed the number of women who climb. Few opportunities for guys, heaven for us. =-)

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Re: Dating Climbers: Good Idea? Bad Idea?
« Reply #13 on: June 26, 2003, 12:19:17 PM »

my wife, Alyssa, and I met through our mutual love of climbing. we climbed all over the country together and had a lot of wonderful times. when we moved up to North Conway it was so that we could be close to the cliffs. now that we have kiddo (Daz) she doesn't climb as much any more and I really miss her as a partner. BUT she understands my passion for the sport and supports me in it. and on the 5-7  days a year we get out together on the rock or ice it never ceases to amaze me how well she climbs "off the couch" and how wonderful it is to be out there with her.
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Al Hospers
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lynniefish

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Re: Dating Climbers: Good Idea? Bad Idea?
« Reply #14 on: June 26, 2003, 01:13:18 PM »

having similar interests is so important. id like to echo Lizzy in saying that i LOVE never having to make excuses to climb. If i EVER want to go out and Andy doesn't (which is very very rare) I know that he can understand the urge.

also, IMHO life is one big adventure. its important to be with someone who wants the have the same type of adventure that you do. someone who wants to share all the little things with you (and for us thats climbing, skiing, medicine, paddling, etc) because there is nothing better than a good adventure.

lynnie
« Last Edit: June 26, 2003, 01:40:53 PM by lynniefish »
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