General > Rock Climbing: Trad

Crystal blue persuasion.

(1/15) > >>

bag11s:
One day a small but motivated team of a-priory knowledgeable fellows- Winken, Blinken, and Nod- signed up to apprentice under the tutelage of Le Maestro. The full immersion crash course self reported itself as providing really special arcane knowledge, solid fundamental skill development, concentrated safety coaching, and much sense and sensibility. Some small amount of exaggeration and hyperbole by Le Maestro may have been noticeable by a sophisticate, but for our intrepid team we can forgive them their boo boo as they really and truly desired initiation into the rarefied next order of things , as is common human nature.

Just as Vodka pours slower after storage in the freezer, our fervent middle aged fellows embarked with vigor in their studies.

First up- Vegetation Cognizance. Maestro reveals some subtleties and minutiae of the crag faunal ecosystem. Our studious trainees are amazed. I, (although un-allergic) am gobsmacked that poison ivy is never mentioned. However, our eager beavers, feeling enlightened by the casting of light on this rarely commented on subject, ferret about to learn some of these really good deep insights. Before long they also can see weakness in in-obvious places, and, in time, they also can observe security in in-obvious places. A transfer of elemental learning occurs and our modest students begin to grow.

Soon they are advancing in their studies to the significant question of long sleeve and trouser leg fabric ratios. Not the headiest topic, but surprising and also satisfying in its voodoo science cum materials science dialogue. (Did I mention that the phrase trouser leg is rather humorous?) Le Maestro beautifully expresses blind faith reliance on the luckiness of the special tee shirt as the unpredictable force that shapes favorable outcomes to trying obstacles. Our students love that, and find themselves on board.

Then Le Maestro's scholars read of the frustration of the grieved unchosen, and sigh because they understand that those sinner's frequencies may never align with Le Maestro. Soon we hear those poor sods complain and swear, and our baccalaureate candidates go Got im Himmel! although they are, all of them, atheists (and will never be more than heathens). They think- "Oh those poor fellows, they do not recognize a true seer, seeing only a false prophet- youtch!"

Onward goes the course of study for the last two of the remaining stalwarts. They leave the flatlands for the freedom of the hills, and inherit the gestalt of the tribe- true, unfiltered, honest, natural. They protect opportunistically, they snap their fingers at danger, they have cemented danger as their middle name. They go, with dreadlocks surging, protecting perfectly. They go, safe beyond dispute. They climb, thousands of glorious feet, as they were meant to.

But still, there are non-believers. The unwashed will never be clean. Purity of mind is only for a select few I guess.

And then there was one.

This is a difficult regimen to follow he thought.

 



 

     

DLottmann:
Fantastic tribute to the one true sage... the Alpha and Omega... for he ever be Lucky...

bag11s:
luck is as luck does

xcrag_corex:
You forgot to mention that one can only follow completely, with all of his being, the one true sage, if only he may also speak in tongues. Tongues only properly translated by the chosen few. May the light of the climbing gods shine brightly upon the shoulders of the chosen few, that never foolishly clamber over ones helmet.

carp:
Put your helmet on luke, there seem to be objective hazards on this thread.

Navigation

[0] Message Index

[#] Next page

Go to full version